The Crosses We Bear
by Sir Perfluous
Summary: A tragic memory from the past helps to put things into perspective for Desmond as he considers the price of being an Assassin, and the very real possibility of losing the woman he loves.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Assassin's Creed.**

**This one-shot is set during AC: Brotherhood. While it's my favorite game in the series, I felt like adding just one more deleted scene here. ;)**

* * *

_The light of the setting sun cast a hazy golden glow upon the secluded garden as Ezio rushed into the gate carrying the injured woman in his arms. His heart raced and he realized that for once, he didn't know where to go or what to do next. All he knew was that Cristina was in danger, and he couldn't let her down. She had been his first love and he promised he would protect her. Even after all these years apart, she had remained in his heart... the one he couldn't ever forget. He was not about to go back on that promise but...  
_

_Cristina stirred and he heard her give a quiet groan. Ezio swallowed a lump in his throat and looked about feverishly for a route across the garden. "Cristina, hold on. I'll get you to a doctor. You're going to be alright."_

_He tried to sound calm and reassuring, but it seemed that even she could see through the desperation in his voice. "No Ezio… I don't think I am."_

_Ezio looked down and saw that her expensive dress was now stained even redder with blood. He set her down gently in the grass and took a moment to examine her side. Ezio felt his stomach drop as he immediately realized her wound was mortal, but Cristina already seemed to know this too. She forced a weak smile as she looked up to him. Her dark eyes met his and she put a soft hand over his._

_Ezio cradled his beloved's head in one hand and felt his chest tighten watching her eyes flutter, "No! Don't go! Stay with me Cristina!"_

_It had been so easy as an assassin to take the lives of others, but what a different thing it was to try and save one in such a hopeless situation. Cristina took a steadying breath and spoke in a quiet comforting voice… one that almost betrayed a hint of pity and sadness, "Ezio, don't you know? I've always been with you."_

_She reached to her dress collar and produced the gold crucifix pendant he had given to her in their youth. Even after all these years, the beautiful young aristocratic girl he had fallen in love with had kept the treasure close to her heart. She had kept him close to her heart, just as he did her. Ezio blinked in silent shock as she reached up to touch his check with a bloodstained hand and smile one last time, "I wish… we could have had… a second chance."_

_Ezio could only look on in helpless despair as the light faded from Cristina's eyes and her breathing ceased. Ezio felt her body relax in his arms even while he gently brushed aside some loose strands of dark hair from her face. The assassin sucked in a sharp breath and tensed, feeling the sting of tears in his eyes and the swell of grief bubbling from his chest. Assassins were supposed to accept death and face it with calmness and dignity... only today he knew that this one time would be an impossible task. Ezio gave Cristina's forehead a tender kiss. As he bowed his head and lovingly cradled Cristina in his arms, Ezio let the bitter tears flow speaking in a solemn whisper, "Requiescat in pace… my love."_

** A. A. A. A. A. A.**

The hazy glare of the sunlight gave way to a brilliant white light as the cobblestone streets and stucco villas of Florence, Italy faded away. When the light finally cleared, Desmond Miles found himself back in the damp underground lair of Monteriggioni. He sat in the chair of the Animus device and blinked away stray tears from his eyes that he didn't know were there. He took several deep breaths and calmed the churning emotions that still lingered in his chest... the result of the all too real genetic memories he had just experienced. His three friends all looked up from their respective monitors and regarded him curiously.

"Desmond? Hey, are you okay over there?" came the voice of the team's technician Rebecca Crane as she powered down the animus completely.

"I... yeah... I'm fine," he said quickly as he sat up and quickly wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his white hooded track jacket.

Across the way, Shaun Hastings adjusted his glasses from his research station and gave a quiet smirk, "Are you sure? You look like you were crying just now."

"I wasn't crying," Desmond snapped defensively toward the Englishman as he slowly got up from the Animus and stretched his legs, "I just had something in my eye, okay?"

He didn't expect Shaun to believe him, especially after the genetic memories he had just relieved. There were times reliving the life of Ezio Auditore had seemed all too real, from the savage violence of battle to the heart pounding fear of death-defying escapes from enemies. Desmond already knew that the legendary assassin had endured a hard life full of struggle and tragedies. Today however, Desmond didn't expect he would have discovered some of the deep repressed memories that Ezio kept locked away in his heart. Even now, Desmond couldn't quite figure out why this particular memory seemed to touch him so deeply and make his heart ache even now.

"We saw what happened to Ezio," said Lucy as she walked over and studied Desmond's face. Her normally serious and focused demeanor had now given way to another side of her that Desmond had seen while he was trapped in Abstergo's labs. The young blonde woman spoke with a gentle voice, "It's possible that a strong synchronization could cause physical reactions to some memories, like the one you experienced just now."

Desmond shrugged and glanced away from her, "Yeah... maybe. I don't know."

Desmond moved to leave the hideout but felt Lucy stop him. She touched his arm and kept her gaze on him with a mixture of concern on her face, "My biggest concern though is that the Bleeding Effect might be at play here... that maybe it caused this. Or that it's making things worse."

"What are you saying Luce?" Rebecca asked as she idly did a diagnostic scan on the Animus.

Lucy turned to Desmond, "Maybe you should lie down and rest for a while, Desmond. You've had a long day in there."

"You'll have to forgive me, but I've been lying down for too long today," Desmond insisted as he shook his head and walked toward the ancient stairwell leading up to the villa.

"And where are you going?" Lucy demanded as she put her hands on her hips.

"To stretch my legs," Desmond replied shortly as he clipped on his earpiece communicator and made his way upstairs, "I'll be back in a while."

The three watched him pull up the hood of his white hooded track jacket and leave without saying anything else. Shaun simply shrugged and gave a snide quip, "What? Was it something I said?"

Rebecca rolled her eyes and gently slapped him upside the head as Lucy walked over to her workstation to get her coat. She slipped on her brown bomber jacket over her white sleeveless turtleneck and headed for the stairwell.

"Lucy? Hey! Where are you going?" Rebecca called.

"I'm going to check on Desmond... to make sure he's okay."

Rebecca exchanged curious look with Shaun, "Are you sure? Because I think he wants to be alone right now."

Lucy gave a quick nod but continued to walk toward the stairwell undeterred, "Maybe... but after everything we saw tonight, I'm kind of doubting that."

* * *

Evening had already set in over the small town of Monteriggioni as Desmond made his way to the rooftops of the old villa situated above the Assassin hideout. The last dying rays of the setting sun hung over the Italian skies casting long shadows on the old stone walls of the fortified town. As Desmond climbed out a window and found a perch on the rooftops of the villa, he took a long moment to savor the peace and quiet, and breathe in the mild October air around him. It had only been a few months since he had been captured by Absertergo Labs and forced to participate in their twisted plots. Only a few short months ago, he had been a regular bartender in New York, living his quiet average life. Never in a million years did he think he'd be halfway across the world, caught up in an epic globe-spanning conflict which had raged for hundreds of years. He never would have thought the bloodlines of the Assassin Order's greatest heroes now ran through him, leading him to this point... wherever this was, anyway.

Desmond fixed his eyes on the setting sun and the reddish golden hue on the horizon, his mind drifting back to Ezio's recent memory: of the blood, the fading light, and the anguish over losing Cristina. Desmond took a deep cleansing breath before he whirled around, hearing some sudden movement coming from behind him. He relaxed his muscles and sighed in relief when he saw who it was. The hidden blade strapped to his wrist had been sheathed and ready to strike. "Lucy... I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting you."

Lucy Stillman regarded him curiously and ambled over from the window to join him on the villa's rooftop, "No. I should be the one apologizing. I guess I shouldn't have tried to sneak up on you just now, huh? You want some company?"

Desmond shrugged and made room for the two of them to stand and look out over the sleepy Tuscan town below. By now, the street lamps of Monteriggioni flickered on one by one casting their peaceful glow in the night air. The two shared a companionable silence before Desmond glanced over toward her, "I thought you had a lot of work to get through tonight."

"I am working," Lucy said as she kept her eyes on the lights, "I'm checking up on the members of my team and I thought I'd start with you."

"Hmm... so you do care," he quipped wryly, "I told you already... I'm fine."

Lucy wrinkled her brow, "Really? You didn't look fine earlier. Desmond, if there's a problem or if you need any help, you know you can ask us and we'll..."

"It's not that," he said waving her off, "The repressed memory caught me off guard today and I just needed some time to process it."

"Did it really affect you that much?" she began to tease, "Because I never would have pegged you as a sentimental romantic type."

Desmond frowned slightly as he turned back toward the distant Tuscan countryside, "I've been spending a lot of time in the Animus recently and sometimes the lines between this reality and the one of the past have started to blur. There was something about that memory today that was just so raw and vivid... so much that it started to get me thinking about some things."

"Oh? Like what?"

"I don't know. Things..." Desmond said while fishing for words,"Like, what if I turn out the same way Ezio did?"

"Technically, you sort of are becoming like him," Lucy pointed out, "The Bleeding Effect has given you his combat skills, his talents, and his instincts."

Desmond shook his head, "That's not what I meant. Ezio never asked to become an Assassin. Neither did I. He threw away everything from his old life to become an Assassin, just like I'm doing now... only there's one difference."

"What's that?"

"I wonder... would I be willing to make the same sacrifices that Ezio did?" Desmond mused aloud, "By the time this whole thing is over, I keep asking myself how much more would I be asked to give up? My family? My friends? The people I care about?"

He looked directly at her when he said that before he glanced away. "Or most of all... my own life?"

"We're all adults here and we know what we signed up for. Shaun, Rebecca, and I can look after ourselves," Lucy reassured him, "It's not like you're some kind of superhero who is responsible for us either."

"No, but there's still a lot riding on my ability to find the Apple and to stop the Templars," Desmond said solemnly, "We've come this far. I can't afford to let all of you down now."

Lucy's expression softened as she drew close and wrapped her arms around his neck in a comforting hug, "I know Desmond. We won't let that happen either. I promise."

"Thanks."

As they stood on the rooftops together, Desmond took a moment to hold her, enjoying her comforting touch and the warmth of their embrace. During his time as a prisoner of Abstergo, Lucy Stillman had been his guardian angel helping him escape and guiding him into the inner workings of the modern Assassin Order. Now that he had the ability, Desmond wanted to return the favor. It was his turn to protect her, and maybe... part of him hoped, to become closer to her too.

"Lucy, if we're being honest... there was one other thing that troubled me about that repressed memory."

They parted slightly and she looked up to him, "What is it?"

"Maybe it sounds kinda lame, but the memories made me worry about missing out. I don't want to miss out on getting a chance to love someone like Ezio did because there's a very real chance that I could be killed fighting the Templars now... for any of us."

"There's an equal chance those kind of feelings for someone could be a distraction to the mission... to our mission."

Desmond looked to her and brushed aside a loose strand of golden hair from her face, "It's still a chance I'd be willing to take. After all, I promised that I would protect you before, didn't I?"

Lucy looked to him in surprise, but didn't pull away from his arms either, "Desmond? What are you doing?"

"Asking you to trust me," he said drawing her close, "Do you trust me?"

"Yes," Lucy answered quietly as she tilted her head to meet his. Desmond leaned forward and slowly pressed his lips to hers in a soft gentle kiss... one that she began to return. They shared in that warm tender glow for a long moment before Lucy suddenly pulled away and let go of Desmond. He blinked and took a hesitant step after her.

"Lucy?"

"I'm sorry Desmond... I... I shouldn't have done that," she said in a flustered voice, trying to catch her breath.

"Then it was my fault," he said, "I'm sorry. If I crossed a line just now..."

"No. You didn't," Lucy admitted sheepishly, "In fact, I'm actually kinda happy about it... it's just... I'm not sure this is the right time for us either."

"Lucy?"

She composed herself and raised a hand to silence him wearing a sympathetic look, "It's not that I don't want to be closer to you too Desmond. Believe me, I do. It's just... I just wish things weren't so complicated right now."

"Yeah... I understand," he nodded in reluctant understanding, "The mission comes first."

"Right," she answered as she turned back toward the open window of the villa. She took a few steps and paused, "Desmond? Can you make me a promise now?"

"Anything."

Lucy turned and glanced over her shoulder to grace him with a soft smile, "Promise me that you'll do your best to survive this war with the Templars? When all of this is finally over, I'd like for us to have our own opportunity at a... _second chance_."

Desmond returned her quiet smile in the twilight, "It's a promise."

Lucy nodded in satisfaction and took his hand, "Right then... let's get back to the cave. We still have a lot of work to do."

As she led him back inside the villa, Desmond took one more look to the last dim rays of sunlight and the glittering lights of the town below. At least for tonight, they didn't seem as lonesome and melancholy as they once did. Tonight there was a faint glimmer of hope that maybe their small team of Assassins would survive to overcome the Templar threat. After all, Desmond still had something to live for and if the fates were generous, maybe he would be able to make good on his promise to his fellow teammates and most of all, to Lucy.


End file.
